doubting.

In the chilly-est days of January I find myself wondering if the sun will ever shine again and if the ground will melt and if the buds on the trees will bloom again. Why do I doubt? The sun always shines, the ground always melts. There is always new life in the spring. And then I get outside on a day that’s chilly, but not the chilly-est and I love it. I wonder to myself how anyone could live without experiencing winter. How you could go through life never wondering if the ground will melt. I remember when Sigge was 3 and we had SO much snow that year. He asked me one day if we would ever seen the green ground again. And I seriously struggled to answer definitively yes. But the good thing about living here almost my entire life is that I KNOW we always swim in the lake in the summer. I ALWAYS get home from a July run and I can’t stop sweating and the sun is so hot I think it might burn off all my skin in the best way possible. So even tho the days have been bitterly cold and I don’t understand how I can skate on top of the lake I swim in 6 months later- I just believe. And this is true of my relationship with God right now too. I feel a little wonder-y and don’t know how God will show up, but just like the million winters and summers I’ve spent in the Midwest so to have I had too many instances where God has been faithful and fulfilled His promises. 

So, cheers to trail runs on the packed snow.  And ice skating on top of water that also allows for the epic diving contests of August… WE CAN GET THROUGH IT!

xo. edc.